Trial by Media (Short Story)

Last night I went to write about the effects of seasonal affective disorder and this short story just flew right out of me. I’m not usually one to share this type of post or even writing short stories in the first place but I thought I would post this anyway as it seemed important to write about this from another perspective.

I hope it’s not too terrible.

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I’ve been thinking about this concept for the past few days, it may have to do with my rewatch of The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt in anticipation of its finale, or the much-anticipated sequel to the film, but are people really unbreakable? What does it say about us (myself included) who feel rather broken, are we to learn from those moments, should we really strive to be unbreakable?

To be honest, I would absolutely love to think of myself as unbreakable, the woman who refused to break after abuse, rape, recurrent miscarriage, and poor mental health. But I’m really not, I’ve struggled to remake my broken shell on a number of occasions, and although seeing myself as being unbreakable appeals to me very much, it also takes away from my struggle.

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My birthday week

Trigger Warning: Miscarriage

Thursday 6th of September

It’s my birthday week so with it comes an amount of stress like no other, I have to be around people, I have to reply to the old friends and acquaintances that post on facebook for the first time since my last birthday. I have to go outside which is in itself a trigger, and I generally end the day doing what I wanted to do since I woke up, curl up on the couch under a blanket, rest my head on my pillows, and eat cake.

This week came with added pressure, to explain I have to tell the story of my second miscarriage, over a year ago we decided to try and get pregnant. Within three months I was pregnant and glowing, I’d been on vacation right before I found out so I was extremely calm, I’d worked hard to get to that mental state, although the anxiety never truly left me.

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