The needle is stuck playing the same track,
All the memories play back to back,
Horror crammed with every sick act,
Although not every moment is exact.
Losing the use of all my facilities,
Those around me become liabilities,
Trapped in my ghastly past,
Present-day is a sharp contrast.
It has been a year since my last miscarriage, tests from Tommys keep being pushed back every few months, in this time I have kept hoping that we will find the problem but after a year it’s being to feel hopeless.
I’m another year older than I was, another year with terrible mental health, and I honestly feel that I have achieved nothing. That’s not true, however, so I thought I’d list my achievements none the less.
I’ve been adrift for a long time,
Without any reason or rhyme,
Deserted amongst the normal,
Wearing jeans to a black-tie formal.Read More »
A clock turns to midnight,
The will o’ the wisps come alight,
Leading to what you want so much,
Ten fingers and ten toes to touch.Read More »
The sun shone on the crystal loch,
A boat sailed out of the dock,
Waves crashed against the shore,
The perfect Cove to explore.
I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t petrified in one way or another. I’m not sure why I am this way, I cannot justify it, being scared has always been a part of my life.
For a long time I tried to understand where the fear came from, has it been from all the bad things in my past? Did something else happen to me at an even younger age?
Tonight I say goodbye,
I promised myself I wouldn’t cry,
This room connects me to a happy time,
But most of my stay here has been an uphill climb.
