Some weeks ago I was sent to the hospital due to my body not recovering from COVID-19 after twelve weeks of symptoms.
Being in the COVID ward was hard enough, surrounded by people who were struggling to take a breath.
After many tests, the doctor was able to tell me that COVID had given me pneumonia, with no underlying conditions.
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I don’t know why I haven’t shared my experience with COVID-19 yet, I think it’s because it was all so real for me when this started.
My partner travels all around the country for work, so it was always going to be brought into this house, and I was always going to catch it.
It started and ended with mild symptoms in my other half, it didn’t seem that nasty to me, I thought if this is what I’m in for it can’t be that bad?
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Yesterday I went into self-isolation due to the thing everyone seems to be talking about right now.
My partner travels all around Scotland for his job and in his many travels around the country he picked up a fever.
Then came the cough and shortness of breath, so like any good citizen he took the advice to stay off work and self-quarantine.
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It will come as no surprise to most of you to learn that I am a flapper, the rest of you probably haven’t heard the term. A flapper is not some weird sea creature but someone who panics and gets agitated with themselves.
I flap therefore I am, at times I think I was born to flap, as somehow it’s encoded into my DNA. I’m always trying to find the answers to everything but could it be I was just made this way?
Abuse comes in many forms, for me, it was both psychological and physical abuse that my ex put me through. Today I’d like to talk about what is left behind after abuse, and what it is like trying to move forward from something that is so hateful.
Recently I’ve been feeling rather down, it seems the change in season has truly won this round, I have absolutely no motivation to do anything, and then today it hit me.
That’s Great
No matter what side of the political aisle you may sit at there’s always going to be times in your life where the government may have stressed you out, but for me, right now seems like a giant ball of stress in my chest.
In the past few years, differing political factions have both been caught up in acts of aggression against the other side and it is beginning to remind me of a time in my early life as I watched my government start to lock people up for being like me.
It has been a year since my last miscarriage, tests from Tommys keep being pushed back every few months, in this time I have kept hoping that we will find the problem but after a year it’s being to feel hopeless.
I’m another year older than I was, another year with terrible mental health, and I honestly feel that I have achieved nothing. That’s not true, however, so I thought I’d list my achievements none the less.
A clock turns to midnight,
The will o’ the wisps come alight,
Leading to what you want so much,
Ten fingers and ten toes to touch.
