It will come as no surprise to most of you to learn that I am a flapper, the rest of you probably haven’t heard the term. A flapper is not some weird sea creature but someone who panics and gets agitated with themselves.
I flap therefore I am, at times I think I was born to flap, as somehow it’s encoded into my DNA. I’m always trying to find the answers to everything but could it be I was just made this way?
Please don’t let that be, please let confidence be something you can gain over time, otherwise, I’m screwed. People will tell me to, “fake it until I make it,” that’s great advice for someone who can fake a positive mental attitude.
Anything I write keeps me up thinking, “Is it any good? Everyone will hate it.” I spiral from all of this, going deeper into my bunker worthy shell, hiding from what I love to do.
But by flapping I am hurting myself as I end up failing because of it. I get so into my own head that I cannot focus on the present, all I can concentrate on is beating myself up over nothing, and then I become stuck.
I wish I could be more consistent in my work, I wish I could be brave enough to share things from my book, and I wish I could tell you all how much I love reading your work.
I will always flap, but I will always be back.
P.S. Happy Halloween 🎃👻🍭