Matilda

She inspired me at a time when I needed her, she felt just as alone as I did growing up, I couldn’t believe a man wrote a book that spoke to my soul at such a young age. Matilda made me want to be a writer, as a child I wanted to connect to other children who felt just as alone as I was, to spread hope that one day it’s going to be ok.

I have created characters in my head as long as I remember, wondering what’s going on inside peoples heads, and making up stories of what their lives could be like. I have been a writer my entire life, that little girl who can’t speak in front of others but leads a rich life inside her own head.

Wondering why people act as they do, some people are violent so what is their story? Wondering why some people are confident while others get scared in the same situation. All the time chasing a story, trying to find that perfect novel inside my head, until Anxiety puts its hat into the ring and makes me so afraid to fail I become stuck in limbo.

If only I could have powers like Matilda, all the horrible things I have been through might lead me to something amazing, but it really hasn’t. I would love to conquer my fear and write that book that is already inside of me waiting to be finished. I just can’t seem to get over the fact that I will fail, and my dreams will be crushed.

But if I never try, my dreams will be crushed anyway.

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