Can I be proud yet?

It’s day twenty of blogtober and I haven’t missed a single post yet.

I know I’ve been a bit dark these past few days, writing some horrible things about myself so I thought I would really force myself to talk about my positives like REALLY force myself because as you know I can’t stand myself. This is going to be the hardest post I’ve ever written but I will do it because I am on an actual roll!

I Draw

I am really good at drawing, I am terrible at landscapes but if you gave me a picture or anything else I could give it a good go. I can pretty much draw anything with pencil, managing a rather lifelike Darth Maul yesterday. When I add paint it can go terribly wrong, I have just started doing watercolours again and I’m very rusty but I’ll get back to a good level of painting.

I’m Kind

Looking after my parents for most of my life has made me a caring person, I am always there if anyone else needs me, and I always have time for those people in my life. Even if I am going through a hard time I make time for other people, it may mean that it takes me a while to get better and I may be erratic but I’m always here.

I’m Passionate

I am generally a shy person but if you stumble onto a topic I am passionate about you will never get me to shut up, I take all that passion and channel it into my writing, and I am very much passionate about mental health. I can talk non stop about films and tv to the point that I can resemble Abed from Community, and don’t get me started on politics.

I will stick up for anyone but myself

This might sound negative but I think it’s a good thing, growing up in the environment that I did has made it impossible for me not to stand up for the little guy, its why I wanted to become a lawyer, and it’s what has driven me for the majority of my life. I’ve seen what politics can do to help and hinder those with disabilities and how a small group of people with a cause they believe in can change lives for the better.

I’m smart

I can thank anxiety, for one thing, it made me rather smart and logical, it also made some of my school tests rather impossible because of all students surrounding me but I finally have this study to thank for making me understand why my I.Q’s so high. Thank you anxiety for giving me a rather remarkable brain.

I would be great in the apocalypse.

If it ever happened in whatever way you believe, I personally believe it would be zombies if it ever happened, but because of my anxiety, I would pay attention to every noise. This is turning into an I’m thankful for my anxiety posts but if you told me zombies had taken over I would pay too much attention to that life-threatening scenario that I would end up surviving.

I am great at picking up skills

I’m crazy good at learning if you show me how to do something you won’t have to do it for long, I have so many hobbies because of this, I might need reminding about how to do something if I haven’t done it in a long time but I am rather great at picking up any skill. From computer programs to knitting there is nothing I can’t pick up quickly.

Empathy

I have so much empathy for others, I can understand the pain and I want to help everyone I can. I don’t want to for any type of gain, I just empathise with other people’s pain, I think it all stems from the carer childhood. I can just feel the pain of others, it’s probably all because of the anxiety reading expressions thing, but I’m sure it’s been with me before I ever got anxious.

I can make fun of myself

To the point that it may start to sound like a comedy set, I’m not including the put-downs of myself because they are rather mean, but I can joke about myself. I have one older brother and no other siblings so I do not take myself seriously and I know how to laugh at my own expense. My jokes are always mostly about myself though, I don’t joke with others that don’t joke about me.

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