Life does as it pleases,
Every day is the same,
I always take the blame.
The Abuse was my fault,
The Rape was my fault,
The Miscarriages were my fault,
The Breakdowns were my fault.
I hurt myself more than anyone else could,
The bruises have faded for good,
But my mind is stuck in time,
Why didn’t I report that crime?
My Mother slapping me was my fault,
My Ex looming over me with a knife was my fault,
Being Cheated on was my fault,
Friendships ending were my fault.
I relive every bad experience I’ve ever had,
They come and go but I still feel utterly sad,
I let them all go on with their lives,
As I am stuck reading my old archives.
Being rape by my Friend was my fault,
Being abandoned by my Brother was my fault,
Every time my Mother put me down was my fault,
The bruises my Ex gave me were all my fault.
I hide inside my own cocoon,
In complete denial about the typhoon,
Drowning inside my own safe place,
As the water reaches my face.
The Depression is my fault,
The Anxiety is my fault,
The PTSD is my fault,
Being Stuck is my fault.