In the words of the legendary Mouse Rat, “I fell into the pit, you fell into the pit, we all fell into the pit.” This is today’s depression speaking, because I may as well have physically fallen into a dark and depressive pit.
I’m not quite sure why I’m here, I’ve been having horrible anxiety for the longest time, and as frustrating and crippling as it is; I’ve always been able to know what is coming and how to handle/avoid it.
No screens before bed, stay away from social media as much as I can, drink plenty of water, paint, create, write, read and most importantly know that in the most crippling moments that the feeling/panic/anger/fear will pass.
The minute I fell depressed I begin to feel like a robot, I feel none of the hundreds of emotions that plagued me before, and I need nothing. I just want to sit or lie down, not be bothered by anyone or anything, and stare into the emptiness of my soul.
Every time I close my eyes it feels like I’m being dragged down with it, I cannot stress enough how much this feeling scares me, and it makes me feel glad when my anxiety comes rushing back to engulf me.
I should never feel that way when it comes to Anxiety, it gives the condition way too much power, but I confess that I would rather feel everything than feel the absolute nothingness that depression comes with.
I hope this bought of depression passes soon, to those who cope with it on a daily basis please know I do commend you, you are all much stronger than I am to have this horrible illness thrust upon you, and I am in complete awe of you.
